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Rank: Admiral OCD
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So this is Cantrip from the future speaking, or CantripFTF, to distinguish from Cantrip from the present, or CantripFTP.
I have come back for a very specific purpose which I outlined in the thread where DCMH asks if he should move in with Whut:
http://www.wdfnews.com/forums.aspx?g=posts&m=103606#103606
(I see Sirus has not gotten around to fixing the link problem in your time where you post a link and it doesn't show up as a link.)
In case you can't follow the broken link, here's what I posted in response to DCMH:
Cantrip wrote:Yes, rent it.
I have come back from the future, a feat possible by the effects of the Large Hebron Collider mishap I kinda caused in my time, which pretty much obligates me to walk the earth carrying this stupid crowbar - but I digress.
Ya, rent it.
If you don't, all kinds of bad things will happen. Plus you get to be closer to your GF. Not that Whut would not put out, or put-in as it were, but you need more clam sauce and less sausage in your life.
Or don't rent it. It's up to you. The temporal prime directive instituted in my time prohibits me from telling you what happens if you don't rent it.
However, if you are reading this, then you did/are going to, rent it. I can't say anything more than that. Many peoples lives, and STD results, are at stake.
So, yeah, DCMH, you did, or are going to, rather, do the right thing.
But a curious thing happened. I, CantripFTF, accidentally bumped in to your Cantrip from this time, CantripFTP. From the past, because to me, this is who I used to be. So there are two Cantrips running around in your present time.
I remember reading in my youth a book by the late author, Douglas Adams, in which he once postulated that if you travel back in time and meet the version of yourself from the past, the universe does not blow up. It's just embarrassing. And it is. I didn't know what to say to myself.
So I asked CantripFTP (From The Past) if I could use his computer and password, and this is how I, CantripFTF (From The Future) can post here today.
Really guys, I just could not resist posting in the past, or from the future in your time reference, because I have had some little adventures since coming back, which can be the subject of future posts - your future and mine. Wow, how confusing.
Anyway, I just want to post about meeting myself from the past in this time. Or me, CantripFTF meeting CantripFTP.
It just happened by accident. I thought I was sick this weekend, the inauguration of Barack Obama, but I guess I don't remember it correctly. I now believe that I had it wrong. I wasn't sick in 2009, I was sick in 2013, during the second inauguration of Barack Obama. So my bad. However, my purpose for being here, to warn DCMH to move in with Whut, has been accomplished.
Anyway, so back to meeting CantripFTP. I happened to walk in using the secret key code I always use to - uh, never mind about that, I just can get in if I want even if I lost my key.
So I walk in as CantripFTP is walking out of the shower. He freaks, as I would, er did, er - see the problem?
Anyway, I identify myself as CantripFTF, from your Cantrip's future.
CantripFTP, skeptical as always, asks me to prove it. Well, I knew the things he knew. I could not remember what he had for breakfast so I failed the test.
I said, "I can prove it."
I started to explain that I, CantripFTF, have always credited Whut with saving me from Cancer. In the year 2009 a new form of cancer was discovered, know in my time as Malignant Swayze-Carcinoma. It was a mutation of a common Melenoma that spreads quickly throughout the body, infecting other organs. It was named after the autopsy was performed on Patrick Swayze, who was the first person to get it. CantripFTP, and me for that matter, had it. I had it removed in 2009, the same year that they developed the test for it, which became routine whenever moles were removed for routine testing.
If it were not for Patrick Swayze, I would not be here.
So, I said I could prove it was him by showing him the scar of where the mole was. -Not many people knew of the mole's location because of it's location. So I stripped down and showed CantripFTP where the mole had been, who the doctor was and what prompted CantripFTP to go to the doctor in the first place - Whut's advice.
So he believed me and let me use his computer to quickly post the warning.
But in the meantime, he was in a towel from just getting out of the shower. I was in a towel from stripping down to show him the mole scar. So basically me, CantripFTF -from the future, am sitting on the bed with CantripFTP -from the past, without any clothes on.
Now, as most of you have figured out me, CantripFTF and CantripFTP are as straight as you can possibly be. Not a gay bone in our bodies, which is the same body, only mine is older. We enjoy donating blood, even though we are afraid of needles because you save 3 lives with each pint of blood you give. The number of people you save is up to 7 in my time because of blood duplicating technology.
So, when they ask "have you ever slept with a man, even once" or "have you ever slept anyone who has slept with a man who has slept with another man, even once" they are asking to prohibit you from donating because of risky behavior. If you have, they don't want you and with good reason. Your blood sux.
However, it would be okay to sleep with yourself right?
I mean, "slept with ANOTHER man" means someone other than yourself right?
So if I slept with myself, from the past, then I would not be sleeping with another man.
I could see in CantripFTP's eyes that he was thinking the same thing. Looking at me longingly at having the opportunity to FINALLY see what all the shooting was about.
So I kissed him. Gently at first, just to test the waters. His face was not shaven yet. His skin so smooth and soft. His hair with a touch of gray less than mine.
I put my hand on his shoulder as I kissed him again. He hesitated slightly, then relaxed. I then gently pulled the towel away, exposing that giant penis we both have, which by the way is/are bigger than any of yours.
I fucking went to town on that cock. And he on mine. Damn! What I had been missing all those years. Spaniard would have been proud.
-If you ever get the opportunity to suck-off your past-self, do it. I recommend it highly!
So, it was a little awkward because we didn’t know what to do next. Hadn’t really contemplated that part in our lives, but we knew it involved a condom and some lube, only we didn’t have any, because we’re not gay. And any of you that say so are faggots.
So hand cream was all we could come up with. I went first, putting on the condom, Trojan Magnum condoms for larger-sized men, like he and I are. Then I banged CantripFTP’s hole so hard I was sweaty all over. That shit was good I tells ya. But I’m not gay, because this was me I was fucking and any of you who say otherwise are faggots.
Only I kinda tagged that a little too hard and I may have hurt him. He went into the bathroom and wouldn’t come out. I had to go report back to headquarters at the rendevous point at my appointed time so that’s where I left him. I’m posting this from a Starbucks near the house.
So, to summarize, that cherry of a hole was sweet y’all. Gawd, and he smelled so good. But if you call us gay, we’ll kick all your faggot asses.
Even though I’m not gay, I think I’ll take CantripFTP with me to visit Whut at his house, which by the way, will be the epicenter of the new order, but I probably shouldn’t say anymore than that, what with the temporal prime directive an all.
So yeah, Whut, if CantripFTP and I, CantripFTF, show up at your house it will be with the intention of making a Whut-sandwich. CantripFTP on the bottom, Whut in the middle and me, CantripFTF on top.
What do you say to that Whut? ‘Cause you know, a sandwich is a sandwich, but a manwich is more like a meal . . .
Peace, out.
-CantripFTF (Cantrip From The Future)
You should be more like Cantrip.  Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Fecal Impaction For the Win!
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Rank: Taco Technician
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Future Cantrip told Dick Cheney to move in with Whut, the proceeded to have sex with the Cantrip we know now.  Cantrip wrote:When I die, I want to be reincarnated as a woman's jogging bra.
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Rank: Fuckstick
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I found this incredibly hot. Is that a bad thing? wrote:{pDs} TitaniumPhoenix: We're Mexican. I say we pull a razor outta our titties and cut them!
[CMS]Noobina: omg thats where you keep yours too?! wrote:{pDs} TitaniumPhoenix: You mean that's not you in my titties? THEN WHO IS IT? D:
{pDs} Razor: I don't know but I would imagine if you push them together you would probably hear AFLAC!!! 
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Rank: Admiral OCD
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TitaniumPhoenix wrote:I found this incredibly hot. Is that a bad thing? Not at all. it's fine to be curious about things. Might I suggest you speak with Reverend Spaniard? -CantripFTF You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Fuckstick
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Cantrip wrote:Not at all. it's fine to be curious about things.
Might I suggest you speak with Reverend Spaniard?
-CantripFTF
Cantrip, darl'n, Spaniard would want nothing to do with me because I have a vagina  wrote:{pDs} TitaniumPhoenix: We're Mexican. I say we pull a razor outta our titties and cut them!
[CMS]Noobina: omg thats where you keep yours too?! wrote:{pDs} TitaniumPhoenix: You mean that's not you in my titties? THEN WHO IS IT? D:
{pDs} Razor: I don't know but I would imagine if you push them together you would probably hear AFLAC!!!
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Rank: Jimmy Hat Jester
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TitaniumPhoenix wrote:
Cantrip wrote:Not at all. it's fine to be curious about things.
Might I suggest you speak with Reverend Spaniard?
-CantripFTF
Cantrip, darl'n, Spaniard would want nothing to do with me because I have a vagina
We need more vaginas around here. get your ass to mars
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Filliam H. Muffman wrote:TitaniumPhoenix wrote:
Cantrip wrote:Not at all. it's fine to be curious about things.
Might I suggest you speak with Reverend Spaniard?
-CantripFTF
Cantrip, darl'n, Spaniard would want nothing to do with me because I have a vagina
We need more vaginas around here. Of course, Titanium! My apologies. I didn't make the connection because of your TitaniumPhoenix double-name, thing. See, in the future, you've droped/will drop, confusing, the Phoenix part of your name because your gaming sponsorship company required your name to fit on a line of gaming mouses/mice that had to be recognized from a distance so all the kids would want one. Hell, I have four of your gaming mice and I also have your patented seat vibrating thing. Let's you feel the boom, and it comes with a program that sucks you off, but that's way in the future for you. Anywho, still, the statement holds true, it's okay to be curious. Maybe we can make a Titanium-CantripFTP-CantripFTF sandwich? What'da say? -CantripFTF You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Fuckstick
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Cantrip wrote:
Anywho, still, the statement holds true, it's okay to be curious. Maybe we can make a Titanium-CantripFTP-CantripFTF sandwich? What'da say?
-CantripFTF
Under one condition:
Mrs. Crawdad has to video tape it and provide drunken commentary wrote:{pDs} TitaniumPhoenix: We're Mexican. I say we pull a razor outta our titties and cut them!
[CMS]Noobina: omg thats where you keep yours too?! wrote:{pDs} TitaniumPhoenix: You mean that's not you in my titties? THEN WHO IS IT? D:
{pDs} Razor: I don't know but I would imagine if you push them together you would probably hear AFLAC!!!
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Rank: Admiral OCD
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TitaniumPhoenix wrote:
Cantrip wrote:
Anywho, still, the statement holds true, it's okay to be curious. Maybe we can make a Titanium-CantripFTP-CantripFTF sandwich? What'da say?
-CantripFTF
Under one condition:
Mrs. Crawdad has to video tape it and provide drunken commentary
DONE!!! -CantripFTF You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Admiral OCD
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Cantrip wrote:TitaniumPhoenix wrote:
Cantrip wrote:
Anywho, still, the statement holds true, it's okay to be curious. Maybe we can make a Titanium-CantripFTP-CantripFTF sandwich? What'da say?
-CantripFTF
Under one condition:
Mrs. Crawdad has to video tape it and provide drunken commentary
DONE!!! -CantripFTF WTF? Hold on a minute here . . . -CantripFTP You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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