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Rank: Fecal Impaction For the Win!

Groups: Registered User, Server Admin
Joined: 1/13/2008 Posts: 1,509 Points: 2,004
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My wife and I are getting our Advanced open water certification. Part of that program involves deep water training, and we went diving in a local lake to fulfill. To make a long story shorter, Ill just say this: the divemaster brought along his GF or wife on this trip. She is a LARGE woman....probably around 300-320 lbs. She required more lead weight to sink than any other person I have dove with (and she was fucking bragging about it)...it was about 46 lbs of lead weight in her jacket. that was freshwater...i can't imagine how much it takes to sink that whale in saltwater. Well we get to the dive site and instead of putting on her gear FIRST and completing the REQUIRED safety checks while geared up. I guess she decides she is too cool for that and is going to throw her BC (the vest that the tank and regulator, etc are all attached to) into the water and put it on while floating. Basically she is showboating how awesome a diver she is (isn't!). Well that stupid idiot didnt account for the 46 lbs of lead weight in the vest and also forgot to inflate the BC to keep it afloat. Fucker sank like a stone. She screams and dives in after it but can't catch it b4 it goes under. Sinks to the bottom in 60-80 feet of water (steep cliff wall on the lake). She lost her tank, BC, regulator, computer, air2.....probably about $2500 she threw overboard. we spent 1.5 hours diving 70 feet below in pitch black trying to find that shit...all i found was alot of dead trees and beer cans from the 70s. Quote:
"Who the fuck is Leon Switch and why does he know we have a dog?" - Mrs. Giller
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Rank: Polio Power!

Groups: Registered User, Server Admin
Joined: 6/14/2008 Posts: 666 Points: 1,416 Location: San Diego
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Trying to be cool and suave is unexcusable of dumb fat people. I think next time you should test how much weights it takes to make her sink the old fashioned witch finding way: tie on a massive rock, if she sinks, she's got enough weight, if she floats, she's a witch and should be burned.
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Rank: Fecal Impaction For the Win!

Groups: {pDs} Member, Registered User, Server Admin
Joined: 1/1/2008 Posts: 1,647 Points: 2,558 Location: Bainbridge Island, WA
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I feel cool because I recognize and understand 100% of the terms and systems here. Too bad I've only gone diving once since getting my open water diver's card. Safety + Peace
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?
Groups: Registered User
Joined: 5/5/2009 Posts: 353 Points: 1,113 Location: San Antonio
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hahaha...well maybe she will learn not to throw 2500 dollars worth of equipment in a lake eh? [CMS]defiance - Steam: defiance018 - Xfire: defianceoby - www.constantmayhem.com
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Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered User
Joined: 5/5/2009 Posts: 36 Points: 108 Location: Denver, CO
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Did the divemaster even give her a hairy eyeball? Or was he whupped?
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Rank: Fecal Impaction For the Win!

Groups: Registered User, Server Admin
Joined: 1/13/2008 Posts: 1,509 Points: 2,004
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Gib_Omelet wrote:Did the divemaster even give her a hairy eyeball? Or was he whupped? He acted cool about it outwardly, but i could tell he was still obviously upset about it. I wouldn't want to be in the 1.5 hour car-ride home with him if i were her. How could you not be affected about losing 2500 bucks to such a silly thing that was 100% preventable if you just do things the right way and not try and take shortcuts or show off. Maybe its an expensive lesson she needed. Worse yet is that they didnt do any safety checks...so maybe this lesson will save her life one day. Its easy to kill yourself diving if you don't follow the safety rules any professional/rec diver knows they shouldnt skip. There just isnt any room for complacency. Quote:
"Who the fuck is Leon Switch and why does he know we have a dog?" - Mrs. Giller
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Rank: Fuckstick

Groups: {pDs} Member, Registered User
Joined: 1/14/2008 Posts: 984 Points: 1,856 Location: Michigan
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Fat people get the bends easier. Maybe she had already had a few mini-strokes from previous dives. That would explain throwing equipment to the bottom of the lake -- brain damage. "I love the smell of napalm in the morning. Smells like ... victory"
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