Pic found on the internets:

You should be more like Cantrip.



Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ."
GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit."
Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. "
WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore."
GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD"
llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!"
Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"

You're a cruel bastard.  Lol.

When I was like ten I lived down the street from"Matt" who decided one day that we should put his family's Siamese cat in his dad's bowlingball bag.  There were five of us in the room and we all thought it wasn't such a good idea and wanted nothing to do with it.  So he cornered the cat and tried to shove it in the bowlingball bag, The cat thought it was an even worse idea than we did.

Siamese cats have really short fur, so we were all surprised when Matt zipped up the bag and a very strange muffled sound/cry came from within the bag.  We looked to find that Matt somehow managed to zip up the cat's very short fur in the zipper, a la There's Something About Mary. We all started to run out of the house and Matt begged me to help him.  I suggested we get an adult to help and he reminded me that his father would kick his ass if he found out.

So every time we tried to unzip the bag, the zipper would get stuck at the fur/skin-clogged spot and we would have to zip  it back up because the cat would scream a horrible scream. And we couldn't cut the bag because his father would kill him for sure. The cat was panicking all this time.

We finally came up with the idea pull the handles apart and unzip the bag quickly.  When the bag opened, the cat popped out feet first, upsidedown.  It looked at us with huge wide eyes.  As he jumped away from us he smacked the glass sliding door and in the split-second he took to regroup, I could see there was a patch about an inch square of bare skin on the poor cat's back.

I can only imagine what the conversation was like with his dad about how the cat lost its fur.

You should be more like Cantrip.



Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ."
GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit."
Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. "
WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore."
GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD"
llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!"
Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"

Hmm, that pic reminds me of one of my theories which I (luckily for cathood I have never been able to test).

Tie a butter bread onto the back of a cat (butter side away from the cat). Theoretically this should be the invention of a antigravity aparature.

 The theory goes as follows;  Cats, as everyone knows, always land on their feet (laws or biology and physics) . On the other hand, a slice of buttered toast always lands butter side down when you drop it over an expensive carpet (Murphy's law).

If you now let go of the butter toast cat combo over an expensive carpet it will never land. It should hover a few feet above the floor and rotate like mad becaue the laws of physics will be working against Murphy's law. The cat cant land on its feet becaue the butter toast will force it to turn around so that the butter can mess up the carpet. The butter toast cant land if you follow the reasoning, because a cat always lands on its feet.