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How to use toilet paper. Options
Filliam H. Muffman
#31 Posted: : Thursday, June 15, 2006 8:34:51 PM
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Reminds me of something you would read on zug.com. Funny shit cantrip.

get your ass to mars
TURBO360NINjA
#32 Posted: : Thursday, June 15, 2006 8:44:01 PM
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Not the reply I had in mind. lol still funny how they kind of avoided the question and gave you coupons.
lol jp jp!â„¢

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The_Spaniard
#33 Posted: : Thursday, June 15, 2006 9:00:31 PM
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Lol, somebody needs to make an article about this on the front page.
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{pDs}Texas Tim
#34 Posted: : Thursday, June 15, 2006 9:03:46 PM
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lol man i want some free toilet paper.
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llenta
#35 Posted: : Thursday, June 15, 2006 11:21:17 PM
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we are sorry we didn't tell you how to use our products, but here are coupons to continue to buy our products.  oh and we won't include instructions on how to use our products in this letter either because we are idiots.  have a good day.
IamDonSharp
#36 Posted: : Friday, June 16, 2006 10:24:00 AM
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If I was you I'd frame that, and hang it in the bathroom.



hshshshshshs
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camelspit
#37 Posted: : Friday, June 16, 2006 1:35:22 PM
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hahahahahahaha!!!

fuckin rock! lol

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Shizzle
#38 Posted: : Friday, June 16, 2006 3:51:58 PM
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thats sick, I'd definitely get it framed like Sharp said.

AKA Shinobi
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bloodhands
#39 Posted: : Friday, June 16, 2006 4:16:31 PM
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Could we get the letter and the response typed up and placed on the main page as "news"?

maybe post a pic of the coupon

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Cannon
#40 Posted: : Friday, June 16, 2006 5:52:10 PM
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I'd reply again with something along the lines of.."You didn't answer my question on how to whipe my ass" 

 

However, could i nab those coupons, we are running low on TP.

Cantrip
#41 Posted: : Sunday, June 18, 2006 3:12:48 PM
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Okay, I think I will frame it. And the letter I sent is in the first post of this thread and you can see the results in the pic. I thought of writing back, but they’ll just ignore me I’m sure.

However, I went to Kimberly-Clark’s website and they have oodles of products. Their customer service department is set up to answer questions, whatever they may be.

So, I propose we send in questions. While you can do it via email, they will dismiss your question much easier than dealing with a piece of paper, and you won’t have a return address for them to send you coupons, which is what they seem to do when they don’t want to answer questions.

Here’s how it works. You have to spend thirty-nine cents on a stamp to mail your letter, ON PAPER, to the following address:

Kimberly-Clark

P.O. Box 2020

Neenah, WI 54957-2020

You need to include your return address. And just because I can see a situation where some of you may have never had to write a letter because of emails, I include the following examples:

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/pw/p_basicbusletter.html

http://www.cyberbee.com/science/letpart.html

However, it can just be a one-sentence letter.

Here are some topics:

Toilet Paper

What’s the best kind to use to toilet paper a house?

I saw on TV that inmates use it to cook, how is this done?

Does toilet paper dissolve in a septic tank?

Tissue Paper

What kind of Kleenex is the best for making spit wads?

Huggies

How often should I change my child?

Pullups

How many uses do you get from one pullup?

Kotex

Where do you put the Kotex?

Should I remove it during sex?

(I think you can have fun with this.)

Depends

Can I wear these for drinking so I don’t have to use the nasty public restrooms.

Here’s the full list of product names:

http://www.kimberly-clark.com/ourbrands/consumer.asp

Once you write your letter you should post the body of it here so others won’t take the same topic. Then post your reply here.

 

You should be more like Cantrip.



Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ."
GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit."
Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. "
WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore."
GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD"
llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!"
Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
Dragon
#42 Posted: : Sunday, June 18, 2006 6:26:36 PM
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omg, you guys are hilarious.  This is funny shit. (lol i said shit)


Cantrip wrote:
When I die, I want to be reincarnated as a woman's jogging bra.
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