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Rank: Admiral OCD
Groups: {pDs} Member, Moderator, News Editor, Newsie
Joined: 5/9/2006
Posts: 3,491
Points: 1,346
Location: Parallel Universe
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Okay, I'm posting this now, but I'm mailing the letter later when I find the address.
So I'm sitting on the can this morning and come to the conclusion that I've read every magazine in the bathroom. So I start looking for other things to read like the cleaning bottle instructions. Then I grab a roll of toilet paper and start reading it.
Hmm. There's some information about the company which made the toilet paper, some info about how your purchase makes a difference in some college fund thing they support . . . something's missing.
Toilet paper comes with no instructions, or at least this brand didn't come with instructions.
So when I get home, I plan to write a letter and send it off to the convenient address they have printed on the wrapper for comments or QUESTIONS.
"Dear sirs:
"I purchased your toilet paper at the store today. When I came home I read the packaging and noticed the instructions on how to use your product were missing. Is this intentional?
"I write to ask you to please send me a copy of the instructions for use of your product. I know it must have been an oversight at the printers because the packaging was quite complete.
"Usually when a consumer product is packaged many to a pack, the individual packs say they are not packaged for individual resale. That is not the case here as each roll may be purchased separately at my grocery store.
"Please send the instructions as soon as possible and thank you for your time and attention to this matter."
Or something like that. I need the package to get the address to send off the letter. I'll post the reply from the company, if they send one.
[You'll notice the proper use of quotation marks on the paragraphs. If you are quoting one paragraph, you put a quote at the beginning and the end of the paragraph. If you are quoting a many-paragraphed piece, you put a quote at the beginning of each of the paragraphs, but not the end of the paragraphs until you come to the very last paragraph. Hmm. I think this belongs in the Admiralty Corner forum.] You should be more like Cantrip.  Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Hyper-Active Attention Gobbling Fuckwing
Groups: {pDs} Member, Registered User
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Posts: 724
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Location: CA
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oh god  Fear the ING! -[Mr.]MaMa-*Bluecell*- -running -varmint
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Rank: Hyper-Active Attention Gobbling Fuckwing
Groups: {pDs} Member, Registered User
Joined: 5/10/2006
Posts: 724
Points: 0
Location: CA
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Come help me do my homework Fear the ING! -[Mr.]MaMa-*Bluecell*- -running -varmint
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?
Groups: Registered User
Joined: 5/9/2006
Posts: 182
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Location: Atlanta, GA - USA
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Rank: Fuckstick
Groups: {pDs} Member, Server Admin
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Posts: 874
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Location: I'm a ninja...I'm everywhere...
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LOL, I can't wait for the reply to see if they are in complete shock. This should be funny, oh, and you have too much time on your hands, lol jp. If you ever get bored of reading something on the toilet, put a....tv in there or something I don't know lol.lol jp jp!â„¢
PEACE IS ALL THE WORLD NEEDS...
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Rank: The Illuminist
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Location: Seattle
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All I can say: Laptop + Wireless G Network + EvE-Online = Never a dull doody.
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Rank: Fuckstick
Groups: {pDs} Member, Moderator, Newsie, Server Admin
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Posts: 525
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I surf the net on with the Cingular 8125:  Passes the time....
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Rank: Not Cool Enough for a Rank :(
Groups: {pDs} Member, Server Admin, WDFNews.com Official Mapper
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Posts: 2,540
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Location: ?
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they aren't going to send you a reply.
if i were the company, i would find the fattest person in the world and have them take the biggest, most wet crap, then take a picture of him holding a roll of the toilet paper in his hand. then put at the bottom, if you can't figure this out, just use your hand.
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?
Groups: Registered User
Joined: 5/9/2006
Posts: 248
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Location: Pittsburgh
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sounds like all of you spend entirely too much time on the can. I try to get in and out as fast as i can that is not a place i want to dawdle in if you know what i mean. oh and i hope you guys wash your hands after doin the duty!!!   nottheballz: ask her if i will ever have sex again lol {pDs} Face: rosie nottheballz: na she stoped {pDs} Face: 2 timing bitch
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Rank: Admiral OCD
Groups: {pDs} Member, Moderator, News Editor, Newsie
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Posts: 3,491
Points: 1,346
Location: Parallel Universe
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Lol. I do have a small radio I listen to. Turn it on when I get there; turn it off after I wash my hands. Fear of germs you see.
And wow, you guys certainly know your techno-dump equipment. Can't see myself playing a video game. Although, we do have a wireless router . . .
And I expect they won't answer. But somewhere, I'll bet there's some consumer protection law which requires companys who make products for human use to print certain warnings or instructions on their packages. There has to be, or one that is close enough to spook them. Just haven't looked yet. Don't have THAT much time on my hands. I'll bet I get a response on the second letter I send them. Muahahahaha. You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Jimmy Hat Jester
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Location: Dani California
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There's always more *ahem* magazines you can purchase to pass the time...
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?
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Twitch is right...I usually go out and get Highlights for kids... ...fantastic puzzles "Try to claim my fame....that's fatal...." -The RZA  
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Rank: Not Cool Enough for a Rank :(
Groups: {pDs} Member, Server Admin, WDFNews.com Official Mapper
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Posts: 2,540
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Location: ?
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Twitchy wrote:There's always more *ahem* magazines you can purchase to pass the time... the magazines you are hinting to don't really help you go to the bathroom though. in fact they would probably prevent it.
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?
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llenta wrote:Twitchy wrote:There's always more *ahem* magazines you can purchase to pass the time... the magazines you are hinting to don't really help you go to the bathroom though. in fact they would probably prevent it.
OMG that reminds me of the movie grandma's boy where he you know all over other kids mom!!! to a laura doll that was great wholesome family entertainment there! nottheballz: ask her if i will ever have sex again lol {pDs} Face: rosie nottheballz: na she stoped {pDs} Face: 2 timing bitch
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?
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Location: Vancouver BC Canada
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haahhahh Cantrip..... you've got too much time on your hands
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