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Rank: Admiral OCD

Groups: {pDs} Member, Moderator, News Editor, Newsie
Joined: 5/9/2006 Posts: 3,491 Points: 1,346 Location: Parallel Universe
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HPV? Uh, at the risk of sounding like I'm not keeping up with the new STDs you kids are passing to each other, what the heck is HPV? Or did you mean HIV, or teh Aids. You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Coathanger Abortion

Groups: {pDs} Member, Server Admin
Joined: 5/17/2006 Posts: 3,487 Points: 1,990 Location: Undisclosed Location
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Filliam H. Muffman wrote:I might be missing something here, but did you finish in her or not? Even if you did, it's not a guarantee that she'll get pregnant but if she takes the morning after pill, then you should be fine anyways. As for diseases, is she's a straight shooter..i.e. normal I don't think you'll have to worry about any serious diseases. The only disease that is likely HPV. Not to worry, it's nothing serious. To ease your mind, I would suggest finding out how many people she's slept with..something that would have been useful before banging her. In any case, where are the pics? even normal people catch and spread shit. regardless of anything I would get tested, doesnt matter how many people she has fucked or anything. if you bang a chick without a condom on you get tested before you stick your dick anywhere else. that's like rule #1 of how not to be an asshole about fucking. even if you dont have symptoms afterwards you could have hpv or some shit - do you want to wind up 10 years down the road having infected 100 chicks? or even worse, if you settle down having to explain to your partner that you gave them aids. Razor wrote:Killing people is good therapy.  
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Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: {pDs} Member, Server Admin
Joined: 5/10/2006 Posts: 81 Points: 0 Location: Omaha, NE
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HPV= Human papaloma virus {pDs} Rebel |Rectal Engineer| Once Nate says something stupid again, I'll put it here!

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Rank: Coathanger Abortion

Groups: {pDs} Member, Server Admin
Joined: 5/17/2006 Posts: 3,487 Points: 1,990 Location: Undisclosed Location
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Cantrip wrote:HPV?
Uh, at the risk of sounding like I'm not keeping up with the new STDs you kids are passing to each other, what the heck is HPV?
Or did you mean HIV, or teh Aids. virus that causes genital warts I think. it causes cancer too. cervical cancer. they have a vaccine for it now at least. Razor wrote:Killing people is good therapy.  
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Rank: Fuckstick

Groups: {pDs} Member, Registered User
Joined: 12/20/2007 Posts: 681 Points: 6 Location: San Antonio, TX
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Wow! How about the option of man-ing up and being a dad if she does get pregnant? I guess I am from a totally different camp than the rest of the folks posting so far. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

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Rank: Fecal Impaction For the Win!

Groups: Registered User, Server Admin
Joined: 1/13/2008 Posts: 1,509 Points: 2,004
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Well I agree with somebody up higher in the thread. If she actually did make it into the academy, then she will probably not have the baby....I dunno...she could be a different woman, but gettting into an academy is no easy task, and I doubt she would be willing to throw it away because of one night in a hottub. You are probably in the clear, but i am also on board with oOpsie. Be accountable man....nobody is self accountable anymore and its bullshit. Quote:
"Who the fuck is Leon Switch and why does he know we have a dog?" - Mrs. Giller
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Rank: Jimmy Hat Jester

Groups: {pDs} Member, Newsie, Server Admin
Joined: 5/16/2006 Posts: 1,796 Points: 81 Location: Dallas
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Dick Cheney's Mechanical Heart wrote:Filliam H. Muffman wrote:I might be missing something here, but did you finish in her or not? Even if you did, it's not a guarantee that she'll get pregnant but if she takes the morning after pill, then you should be fine anyways. As for diseases, is she's a straight shooter..i.e. normal I don't think you'll have to worry about any serious diseases. The only disease that is likely HPV. Not to worry, it's nothing serious. To ease your mind, I would suggest finding out how many people she's slept with..something that would have been useful before banging her. In any case, where are the pics? even normal people catch and spread shit. regardless of anything I would get tested, doesnt matter how many people she has fucked or anything. if you bang a chick without a condom on you get tested before you stick your dick anywhere else. that's like rule #1 of how not to be an asshole about fucking. even if you dont have symptoms afterwards you could have hpv or some shit - do you want to wind up 10 years down the road having infected 100 chicks? or even worse, if you settle down having to explain to your partner that you gave them aids. You realize I'm not arguing against testing right? The fact that theres a good chance that something like HPV should be enough for him to get his ass tested. I know it doesn't matter how many people Mary Jane Rottencrotch has fucked, I'm just hoping he's not banging some dirty skank, especially if he's not using a condom. get your ass to mars
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Rank: Coathanger Abortion

Groups: {pDs} Member, Server Admin
Joined: 5/17/2006 Posts: 3,487 Points: 1,990 Location: Undisclosed Location
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Filliam H. Muffman wrote:Dick Cheney's Mechanical Heart wrote:Filliam H. Muffman wrote:I might be missing something here, but did you finish in her or not? Even if you did, it's not a guarantee that she'll get pregnant but if she takes the morning after pill, then you should be fine anyways. As for diseases, is she's a straight shooter..i.e. normal I don't think you'll have to worry about any serious diseases. The only disease that is likely HPV. Not to worry, it's nothing serious. To ease your mind, I would suggest finding out how many people she's slept with..something that would have been useful before banging her. In any case, where are the pics? even normal people catch and spread shit. regardless of anything I would get tested, doesnt matter how many people she has fucked or anything. if you bang a chick without a condom on you get tested before you stick your dick anywhere else. that's like rule #1 of how not to be an asshole about fucking. even if you dont have symptoms afterwards you could have hpv or some shit - do you want to wind up 10 years down the road having infected 100 chicks? or even worse, if you settle down having to explain to your partner that you gave them aids. You realize I'm not arguing against testing right? The fact that theres a good chance that something like HPV should be enough for him to get his ass tested. I know it doesn't matter how many people Mary Jane Rottencrotch has fucked, I'm just hoping he's not banging some dirty skank, especially if he's not using a condom. yeah I do, that wasn't really meant to be directed towards you in anyway. something else to add, rule#3 of fucking without being an asshole: If she chooses to have an abortion you are paying the bill. Razor wrote:Killing people is good therapy.  
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Rank: Jimmy Hat Jester

Groups: {pDs} Member, Newsie, Server Admin
Joined: 5/16/2006 Posts: 1,796 Points: 81 Location: Dallas
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Dick Cheney's Mechanical Heart wrote:Filliam H. Muffman wrote:Dick Cheney's Mechanical Heart wrote:Filliam H. Muffman wrote:I might be missing something here, but did you finish in her or not? Even if you did, it's not a guarantee that she'll get pregnant but if she takes the morning after pill, then you should be fine anyways. As for diseases, is she's a straight shooter..i.e. normal I don't think you'll have to worry about any serious diseases. The only disease that is likely HPV. Not to worry, it's nothing serious. To ease your mind, I would suggest finding out how many people she's slept with..something that would have been useful before banging her. In any case, where are the pics? even normal people catch and spread shit. regardless of anything I would get tested, doesnt matter how many people she has fucked or anything. if you bang a chick without a condom on you get tested before you stick your dick anywhere else. that's like rule #1 of how not to be an asshole about fucking. even if you dont have symptoms afterwards you could have hpv or some shit - do you want to wind up 10 years down the road having infected 100 chicks? or even worse, if you settle down having to explain to your partner that you gave them aids. You realize I'm not arguing against testing right? The fact that theres a good chance that something like HPV should be enough for him to get his ass tested. I know it doesn't matter how many people Mary Jane Rottencrotch has fucked, I'm just hoping he's not banging some dirty skank, especially if he's not using a condom. yeah I do, that wasn't really meant to be directed towards you in anyway. something else to add, rule#3 of fucking without being an asshole: If she chooses to have an abortion you are paying the bill. ^good one. And to make sure you're there for her afterwards. That's not an easy thing to go through. get your ass to mars
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Rank: Admiral OCD

Groups: {pDs} Member, Moderator, News Editor, Newsie
Joined: 5/9/2006 Posts: 3,491 Points: 1,346 Location: Parallel Universe
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Okay, everybody settle down. If there's one thing I have learned about dealing with chicks is they frakking love drama. She's not pregnant. You don't have an STD. Nothing is going to happen to you as a result of this one night of zero-Gee bonking. Do not panic. You only have a problem IF, and that's a big IF, (in caps, bolded, underlined and in italics), IF she is pregnant or she had an STD. She's not pregnant unless she tells you she is, and even then, you go to a frakking doctor's office, off-base, to get her tested by the doc and that's after you have her take multiple piss-stick tests. And the STD thing is not a concern unless your dick falls off, she tells you she has an STD that the military testing missed, or you get tested, off-base, for all kinds of things they can test for, just to give yourself piece of mind. And now time for a Cantrip mini-story. My friend was in the military years ago and he was banging this nurse chick and they finally broke up, called each other names, yada, yada, yada. She was one of these chicks who moved near a military base to date military dudes. Well, she calls my friend very concerned and tells him she was just diagnosed with chlamydia (Wiki), and that her doctor told her she had to inform all the people she had sex with since she got to the area, that she had to do this so they could get tested, and that he was one of the dudes that could have given it to her. The test at that time involved pain. The base doctor told my friend to sit on his hands. When my friend asked why, the doctor replied because the doctor didn't want to have to press assault charges against him. Confused, my friend did what the doctor ordered. The doctor took out a long metal wire with a bent scoop/crook at the end, shoved it up his urethra (his pee hole) and twisted to get a biopsy sample for testing. My friend wanted to scream it hurt so much. -The test came back negative. When my friend called his ex to say WTF? and that he did not have chlamydia, she said, "Hmmf, well, I guess it wasn't you that gave it to me." She kinda laughed as she hung up on him. The bitch did not have that disease. She was a nurse, remember?, and knew what was involved in the testing -she just wanted to have him take the test to cause him unnecessary pain. So maybe you can do all the other tests but that one, if you really want piece of mind. Otherwise, count your lucky stars, promise never to stick your cock into any woman, or man, without wrapping that rascal, and be a little more selective of whom you bang. You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: The Illuminist

Groups: Administration
Joined: 5/8/2006 Posts: 8,410 Points: 2,875 Location: Seattle
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Oopsie wrote:Wow! How about the option of man-ing up and being a dad if she does get pregnant? I guess I am from a totally different camp than the rest of the folks posting so far. While I don't share your faith driven convictions, I will agree on your point here. Perhaps to everyone's surprise, I'd man up. But most women I've been with are abortion happy. My advice for now: Morning after and get tested. My advice for later: anal sex The thing with me about rubbers is I have trouble using them. Always have. Can't keep the boy juiced up when wearing one. I've tried multiple kinds etc etc. Without one I function fine. I get so focused on how it feels that I can't enjoy the sex. Limp noodle. But yeah, condoms are neat and shit for not getting a disease. I take the other route. I don't really one-night stand it anymore. I'm pretty much all about team-testing. Get the birth control figured out, get tested together so you both know the results... then plug that fucker. Please note, my advice is incredibly stupid.
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?
Groups: {pDs} Member
Joined: 5/9/2006 Posts: 103 Points: 0 Location: CA
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A little bit of background information and answering a few questions you guys may have asked. First off, incredible body - okay face. Alcohol cured the latter. No pic due to possible damage to camera, and yes I thought about it. The best I can do is show you guys a pic of her. Kinda manly lookin, but like I said alcohol made it better. These are usually known as "Butter-faces". The girl - mother/father incredibly religious and plenty of rules. Has a boyfriend (bad call on my part) who happens to be an inexperienced 17 year old (she just graduated, and she's 18 so it's not rape). Her inexperience is a testament to her performance, which was sub-par, but nothing to complain about. I did NOT finish inside her, but came extremely close. She calls me today and tells me she was actually on her period, but had stopped that night - yes women can do this. This is a fact, I did things and no recollection of blood. She has absolutely no memory of what happened. Score 2 points. Irony of the situation, I have two boxes of condoms in my car and I usually keep one in my wallet just in case. I took that condom out a few days before for absolutely no reason. I won't do that again. I am not one to sham on my responsibilities, I always man-up. Oh, she doesn't want kids, score 3 points. Thanks for the advice everybody, especially Cantrip. Good lesson learned. ...and whut. I like your way of thinking. Butt secx is a great alternative...if only most women thought the same way. Iraq-Bound 29 AUG 08 - Tikrit
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Rank: Admiral OCD

Groups: {pDs} Member, Moderator, News Editor, Newsie
Joined: 5/9/2006 Posts: 3,491 Points: 1,346 Location: Parallel Universe
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Yeah, if she has alcohol and says she didn't remember anything, you might not want to talk to her about that over the phone. Could have the cops on the other end egging her on to get you to confess to some kind of crime. It's called a "cool call" and is used to get the poor perp to spill his guts when he thinks he is talking to the chick without the cops recording it. Only a concern if she was truly wasted and could not consent. Just food for thought. And 18 years old but face like a horse's ass? I would still bone her. -Remember, beauty is only a light switch away . . . You should be more like Cantrip. Twitchy: "I pulled a Cantrip . . ." GivePeaceAChance: "If the Tempest had nipples, I'd pinch that shit." Xylicon: "I'm about to deliver my [Richard] in your face for posting that stupid shit. " WDF?: "He keeps reaming me... night after night... I'm rather sore." GivePeaceAChance: "OMG MY NIPS ARE HARD" llenta: "cantrip, you fail!!!" Filliam H. Muffman: "i'm on top of dick"
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Rank: Polio Power!

Groups: {pDs} Member, Registered User, Server Admin
Joined: 1/7/2008 Posts: 586 Points: 630 Location: Minneapolis
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Cantrip wrote:
-Remember, beauty is only a light switch away . . .
...or a paper bag...  HAHA stupid horse, the sign says Deer crossing Cantrip wrote:For all you know, you may have been dessert on a day-long cock-feast.
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Rank: You're gonna stick that where?

Groups: Registered User
Joined: 5/17/2006 Posts: 363 Points: 0 Location: San Jose, CA
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Don't keep condoms in your wallet, by the way.
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